I've been reading through Exodus recently -- not out of excess piety, but because I have to read the whole Old Testament for my Old Testament course -- and I've noticed some interesting things. While it's easy to parse the Bible into interesting bits (Genesis, Samuel/Kings, the Gospels, Romans, maybe some psalms) and uninteresting bits (Deuteronomy, Leviticus, many of the minor prophets, Revelation if you're not inclined to enjoy bizarre conspiracy theories, etc.), I'm starting to see the wisdom in reading all of it straight through once in a while. Buried deep in the boring bits of Exodus, I've found two fascinating tidbits:
1 Consecration and Putting Words in God's Mouth (Exodus 19:9-15)
In preparation for giving the Ten Commandments God tells Moses to get the people cleaned and washed and all purtied up in their Sunday Best. In the tradition of viewing the relationship between the God (holy) and his people (mostly unholy) as a kind of cosmic battery where touching the holy and unholy ends together would cause some rather large sparks, God also tells Moses to keep the people the hell away from Mount Sinai so that they don't, y'know, die. God tells all this to Moses and Moses goes down and reports it faithfully to the people. They get consecrated, they wash their clothes, and then (almost as an afterthought, just before we move on to Moses going up the mountain) says "Prepare for the third day; do not go near a woman"
Now, I could be missing some important historical assumption here, but I find it fascinating that Moses (who is at this point God's good little messenger, dutifully running up and down the mountain for several months) seems to add on this no-sex rule of his own initiative. God didn't say anything about it, but Moses seems to think that being in your Sunday best involves keeping away from the missus. There's an interesting lesson there in our assumptions about what's holy and what God wants, as well as the way patriarchy gets imposed on otherwise gender-neutral religious events...
2 It Shall Be Made of Acacia Wood from the Trans-Jordanian Forest Aged Exactly Four Years and Two Months, and It Shall Be Two and Half Cubits Long by One and Three-Eighth Cubits High ...
Exodus 25 through 31 are, without exception, the longest Home Hardware list EVER. Followed by what is possibly the most boring do-it-yourself account EVER in Exodus 36 to 39. First there's God saying "You shall" and telling Moses exactly how to go about making a pretty box and an even prettier tent to keep the tablets of the law in, right down to how many rings should be on the curtains and what they should be made of. Then there's a brief break for Moses to go back down the mountain, have a hissy fit (including a few plagues and massacres) because the Israelites decided to do a little idol-worship while Moses was away, then the narrative resumes with the Israelites (newly zealous about their faith) banding together to donate the gold needed for those ten specific curtain rings God asked for. It's Extreme Makeover: The Exodus Edition!
In the midst of breaking my own recently-made rule on not speed reading (see my other blog) I realized something interesting about these long, boring passages. They illustrated that the Israelites (as people all over the world, then and now) are really good at following the specific rules and instructions, but really suck at getting the larger, more important messages. Build a box two cubits wide by 3 and a half cubits long and make it out of gold? No problem. Love God and love your neighbour? Uhhh.... God could spend the rest of our lives telling us to build pretty boxes, and we'd probably get pretty good at it, but that's not going to help us figure out how to live well.
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Monday, September 10, 2007
We Tell Stories
[I wrote this over a year ago, so long that I can't even remember where I got the Joan Didion quote from. I don't think I've ever read a book called 'The White Album,' so it must have been quoted in another book, but what that book was I'll never know. In any case, this is one of my more polished pieces, I think]
"We tell ourselves stories in order to live...We look for the sermon in the suicide, for the social or moral lesson in the murder of five. We interpret what we see, select the most workable of the multiple choices. We live entirely, especially if we are writers, by the imposition of a narrative line upon disparate images, by the "ideas" with which we have learned to freeze the shifting phantasmagoria which is our actual experience."
~Joan Didion The White Album
Students everywhere realize pretty quickly that people (teachers especially) tend to overestimate the importance of their own subject. Math teachers will tell you the whole world is run by equations, Philosophy teachers believe it all depends on the ideas in our heads, and so on. It’s an old, old notion, perhaps best expressed by Philip Sidney in his Defense of Poetry: "self-love is better than any gilding to make that seem gorgeous wherein ourselves be parties."
So I probably need not tell you why I, as an English student, was interested in the quotation above. What better way to justify my love of stories than to say that stories are not just reflections of reality, but constitutive of it? If I have read Joan Didion right, then what she is suggesting is not that our life makes stories, but that our stories are life. We cannot understand what’s going on around us, and so we make narratives that cut and paste reality into a diorama of our "life".
But perhaps this theory isn’t just the rantings of someone who read too much as a child – maybe this theory actually has credibility (not that the scientists of the world don’t have a pretty good claim on Unified Theories of Everything, but at the moment, I’m the one on the microphone). Incessantly and unconsciously, we create a tv show (or a novel, or a movie, or a play – the media doesn’t matter) of our own lives – we watch ourselves to understand what it is that we’re doing here. Whether that creation is a tragedy or a comedy (or, God forbid, a slasher flick) depends on us, on our proclivities and our fears. At the end of each day, as we compose ourselves towards sleep, does the heroic music swell and the lens swing to a wide shot of our hero silently celebrating a job well done? Or does the eerie minor key and quick cut to black indicate that all is not well, that something is very rotten in the state of I?
Believing in the power of story is something what fuels my interest in (nay, obsession with) the Bible. While the debates on the authenticity of the Bible are important, I find them secondary to the importance of the story, of the way the Isrealites and the early followers of Jesus went about shaping their experiences into something intelligible (strange and bizarre, certainly, but intelligible nonetheless). We all want to find meaning in life, and the stories of the Bible give us that, give us a narrative of sin and redemption which can be applied to our own personal experiences. I screw up, I feel bad about it, I receive some kind of forgiveness. I live to screw up and be saved again another day.
The Israelites reference to the "God of Abraham and Isaac" isn’t just a way of claiming a kinship with those set apart by God, it’s also (and perhaps more importantly) saying "We believe in the God who promised things to Abraham, the God who both condemned Isaac to death and and saved him." Believing in the God of Abraham and Isaac is bound up with believing in the stories of Abraham and Isaac. Likewise, believing in Jesus means investing in the stories he tells, in understanding what it means to be a prodigal son or a lost sheep "carried home to great rejoicing" (Luke 15:5). For those of us interested in historical and literal truth, I mention the parables as an example of a story that is True (with a capital T) without needing to be factual.
But stories need not be written down to be important. In my rampant bibliophilia, I sometimes forget that the religion I believe in is called "Christianity", not "Bible-anity". In the religious sense, stories are not only past relics of what God has done, but current explanations of what God is doing. The long tradition of "testimonials" (a word now corrupted by crass tv infomercials) shows us that as believers we need to hear the stories of other believers. In times when God seems to be missing-in-action, we receive stories of healings and miraculous interventions as eagerly as the desert drinks up the rain. An inveterate skeptic, I usually hear reports of miracles and let out an internal "Hmph!", but I cannot deny my own need for stories of hope and faith justified. I knew for several years that a mentor of mine had a story of healing which he had stopped telling because he wanted to allow it to be his son’s story. While he did, finally, explain what had happened, I realized that even without knowing the story, it gave me comfort to know that someone so solid and real and normal had had an extraordinary experience of God’s love. The idea that there was a story there (even if I didn’t know it) was enough to feed my faith.
I believe, and so I, in Joan Didion’s words, select faith as "the most workable of multiple choices". I freeze the "shifting phantasmagoria of my actual experience" and I see the face of God. As people of faith, we are called to embrace the story (with all its plot twists and reversals of fortune and anguishing cliffhangers) and acknowledge that as much as we may speak or write our own stories, we are not in control. As any writer will tell you, what you intend to write and the story that ends up on paper are entirely different. So it is with life. We live in the hope that we can understand the meaning behind things, that there really is a "sermon in the suicide" – and I’d like to believe that there is. But perhaps the meaning is one we do not want to know, or one that is beyond our capability to understand. We tell ourselves stories so that we may live, and God gives us stories so that we may hope. And learn.
So go out and tell stories. Go out and find stories. Go out and recognize that the life we live may not have happy endings or easy morals, but it is filled with meaning anyways. And recognize the buried treasure in your life; those stories of God (against all reason and sense) actually showing up.
"We tell ourselves stories in order to live...We look for the sermon in the suicide, for the social or moral lesson in the murder of five. We interpret what we see, select the most workable of the multiple choices. We live entirely, especially if we are writers, by the imposition of a narrative line upon disparate images, by the "ideas" with which we have learned to freeze the shifting phantasmagoria which is our actual experience."
~Joan Didion The White Album
Students everywhere realize pretty quickly that people (teachers especially) tend to overestimate the importance of their own subject. Math teachers will tell you the whole world is run by equations, Philosophy teachers believe it all depends on the ideas in our heads, and so on. It’s an old, old notion, perhaps best expressed by Philip Sidney in his Defense of Poetry: "self-love is better than any gilding to make that seem gorgeous wherein ourselves be parties."
So I probably need not tell you why I, as an English student, was interested in the quotation above. What better way to justify my love of stories than to say that stories are not just reflections of reality, but constitutive of it? If I have read Joan Didion right, then what she is suggesting is not that our life makes stories, but that our stories are life. We cannot understand what’s going on around us, and so we make narratives that cut and paste reality into a diorama of our "life".
But perhaps this theory isn’t just the rantings of someone who read too much as a child – maybe this theory actually has credibility (not that the scientists of the world don’t have a pretty good claim on Unified Theories of Everything, but at the moment, I’m the one on the microphone). Incessantly and unconsciously, we create a tv show (or a novel, or a movie, or a play – the media doesn’t matter) of our own lives – we watch ourselves to understand what it is that we’re doing here. Whether that creation is a tragedy or a comedy (or, God forbid, a slasher flick) depends on us, on our proclivities and our fears. At the end of each day, as we compose ourselves towards sleep, does the heroic music swell and the lens swing to a wide shot of our hero silently celebrating a job well done? Or does the eerie minor key and quick cut to black indicate that all is not well, that something is very rotten in the state of I?
Believing in the power of story is something what fuels my interest in (nay, obsession with) the Bible. While the debates on the authenticity of the Bible are important, I find them secondary to the importance of the story, of the way the Isrealites and the early followers of Jesus went about shaping their experiences into something intelligible (strange and bizarre, certainly, but intelligible nonetheless). We all want to find meaning in life, and the stories of the Bible give us that, give us a narrative of sin and redemption which can be applied to our own personal experiences. I screw up, I feel bad about it, I receive some kind of forgiveness. I live to screw up and be saved again another day.
The Israelites reference to the "God of Abraham and Isaac" isn’t just a way of claiming a kinship with those set apart by God, it’s also (and perhaps more importantly) saying "We believe in the God who promised things to Abraham, the God who both condemned Isaac to death and and saved him." Believing in the God of Abraham and Isaac is bound up with believing in the stories of Abraham and Isaac. Likewise, believing in Jesus means investing in the stories he tells, in understanding what it means to be a prodigal son or a lost sheep "carried home to great rejoicing" (Luke 15:5). For those of us interested in historical and literal truth, I mention the parables as an example of a story that is True (with a capital T) without needing to be factual.
But stories need not be written down to be important. In my rampant bibliophilia, I sometimes forget that the religion I believe in is called "Christianity", not "Bible-anity". In the religious sense, stories are not only past relics of what God has done, but current explanations of what God is doing. The long tradition of "testimonials" (a word now corrupted by crass tv infomercials) shows us that as believers we need to hear the stories of other believers. In times when God seems to be missing-in-action, we receive stories of healings and miraculous interventions as eagerly as the desert drinks up the rain. An inveterate skeptic, I usually hear reports of miracles and let out an internal "Hmph!", but I cannot deny my own need for stories of hope and faith justified. I knew for several years that a mentor of mine had a story of healing which he had stopped telling because he wanted to allow it to be his son’s story. While he did, finally, explain what had happened, I realized that even without knowing the story, it gave me comfort to know that someone so solid and real and normal had had an extraordinary experience of God’s love. The idea that there was a story there (even if I didn’t know it) was enough to feed my faith.
I believe, and so I, in Joan Didion’s words, select faith as "the most workable of multiple choices". I freeze the "shifting phantasmagoria of my actual experience" and I see the face of God. As people of faith, we are called to embrace the story (with all its plot twists and reversals of fortune and anguishing cliffhangers) and acknowledge that as much as we may speak or write our own stories, we are not in control. As any writer will tell you, what you intend to write and the story that ends up on paper are entirely different. So it is with life. We live in the hope that we can understand the meaning behind things, that there really is a "sermon in the suicide" – and I’d like to believe that there is. But perhaps the meaning is one we do not want to know, or one that is beyond our capability to understand. We tell ourselves stories so that we may live, and God gives us stories so that we may hope. And learn.
So go out and tell stories. Go out and find stories. Go out and recognize that the life we live may not have happy endings or easy morals, but it is filled with meaning anyways. And recognize the buried treasure in your life; those stories of God (against all reason and sense) actually showing up.
Thursday, September 6, 2007
Theological Shite.
That was supposed to be the name of this blog, as suggested by a good friend of mine. But when it came right down to it, I wasn't comfortable enough with swearing to stare at that name at the top of the blog every time I went to post something. So I settled on the much more mundane "theological thoughts" instead. Sorry.
The truth is, though, much of it will be shit -- just the detritus of my brain, thrown out into the wide world of the internet so that I can sleep well at night. Most of the time, I quite honestly write these ramblings because I've got no other choice. I'm seized by an idea which rattles around until I can no longer stand it, until, like Matilda in Roald Dahl's book, I feel like I could shoot beams of pure energy right out my eyes with all the pent-up religiousity I've got inside. So I write it out, and only then do I feel relief.
Some of these posts will be sermons in foetal form, some of them will be letters to myself, some rants to God, and a perhaps a few which fit in no other category than 'ramblings'. In any case, I thought I'd start this blog to get the four or five pieces I've already got on my computer off it, and to provide a resource for myself sometime down the road when I'm speaking at a church or some such and want to remember that semi-brilliant thought I had a few weeks ago. And of course to give me a place to put my eye-beam writings. I've seperated this out from my other blog so that I don't have to worry about digging through other posts to get to what I want, and so that I can maintain the division I feel I need between everyday, non-faith type stuff and my theology degree which could too easily take over my entire life.
Since these are just thoughts, feel free to criticize and disagree to your heart's content. Sometimes I think what I've written is brilliant, so I'd appreciate someone telling me that it's actually crap (or it's got some major leaps of logic) before I decide to use it in front of several hundred people. Also, for those of you who share my faith, you can catch me out on any heretical bits/bad biblical exegesis that could get me in hot water with the big ol' bearded guy who lives up in the sky. Comments, of any kind, are encouraged.
Let the shit-stream begin!
The truth is, though, much of it will be shit -- just the detritus of my brain, thrown out into the wide world of the internet so that I can sleep well at night. Most of the time, I quite honestly write these ramblings because I've got no other choice. I'm seized by an idea which rattles around until I can no longer stand it, until, like Matilda in Roald Dahl's book, I feel like I could shoot beams of pure energy right out my eyes with all the pent-up religiousity I've got inside. So I write it out, and only then do I feel relief.
Some of these posts will be sermons in foetal form, some of them will be letters to myself, some rants to God, and a perhaps a few which fit in no other category than 'ramblings'. In any case, I thought I'd start this blog to get the four or five pieces I've already got on my computer off it, and to provide a resource for myself sometime down the road when I'm speaking at a church or some such and want to remember that semi-brilliant thought I had a few weeks ago. And of course to give me a place to put my eye-beam writings. I've seperated this out from my other blog so that I don't have to worry about digging through other posts to get to what I want, and so that I can maintain the division I feel I need between everyday, non-faith type stuff and my theology degree which could too easily take over my entire life.
Since these are just thoughts, feel free to criticize and disagree to your heart's content. Sometimes I think what I've written is brilliant, so I'd appreciate someone telling me that it's actually crap (or it's got some major leaps of logic) before I decide to use it in front of several hundred people. Also, for those of you who share my faith, you can catch me out on any heretical bits/bad biblical exegesis that could get me in hot water with the big ol' bearded guy who lives up in the sky. Comments, of any kind, are encouraged.
Let the shit-stream begin!
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